I think the era where I'm gonna fill a table with miniatures is over, but now that wargaming and board gaming have this plump and ample skirmishy middle I don't have to. There's a million ways to get this nutrition, now. Even CMON regularly puts out boardgames I'd happily call wargames; it reminds me a little of the period where even as the traditional JPRG was losing ground, its trappings became inescapable in other genres. These metaphors just fucking work, they've got massive cognitive handles on them like kettlebells. And, by hefting them, the mind grows strong.

My Acquisitions Inc. game at PAX East was an absolute blast! The players were totally over powered and cheated constantly but it didn't matter because in the end, I am the DM and I can do whatever I want. And boy did I! You can watch the entire thing right here on the Yub Tub:

I didn't name the strip Lobsterian, Gabe did, but I probably would have named it Lobsterian given the opportunity. On one hand, I could be agitated that he is able to simulate me completely, further diminishing my efforts - but, man. That honestly strikes me as very good news. I get paid the exact same.

I’ve had a few requests for a version of this year’s PAX East cover suitable for desktops. Enjoy!

My Pixel 3, and maybe Android phones in general, I don't know, thinks it knows what kind of news I'm interested in. Sometimes it's right, but it's no great feat; I probably do want to know how I can give Games Workshop even more money. That doesn't require, like… Carnivore or some shit. But it's also revealed these second and third tier news holes whose only purpose seems to be saying one partially new or hastily recontextualized thing on a hot button SEO topic to get churned up by these algorithms. Right now the gristle in their teeth are the magic numbers attached to gaming hardware and man do they ever want me to have an opinion on this.

(I'm writing this in the cab on the way to the airport.)

PARTNER PINS

There are so many ways to "be online." At one point, you might have dialed into a major service or dialed into a service provider. This would have been about the same time I was hauling Token Ring cables out of office buildings the way you'd pull out the roots and vines of an invasive species.

Ol' Greasy Gribbs and I really enjoyed the first season of The Dream, a podcast which was (at that time) concerned with Multi-Level Management schemes, the shoddy products they sell, and the legal framework they've accreted over time to provide nearly impenetrable cover for something like parasitic fraud.

I've got a bit of bad news to deliver unfortunately. Here's a message from PA about our pin selection at PAX East this year. 

Gabe and I don't agree on much other than the fact that we should attempt to disagree without rancor. It's not always possible but we manage it a statistically significant amount of the time. I am of the opinion, as enunciated in the strip, that making things is fundamentally valuable. It's valuable to me and it's valuable to other people. This value is broadly defined; one way it's valuable is that in my experience creative work is very rarely wasted. It always comes back. Sometimes we'll have an idea fifteen years earlier than we could do justice to it and we have to circle back.

I love falling back into The Division. The cover-based shooting gallery just works for me; it's only gotten better (for the way I play the game, at least) after they really goosed the damage skills put out. I have a sniper turret I can deploy that fires Eiffel Towers, judging from the damage; it has its own cooldown between shots, so between that and the precision rifles I'm already using me and this weird little robot essentially form a sniper team just between the two of us.

The Geoff Keighley news - specifically, that he wasn't going to manifest as a kind of E3 Avatar this year - is beyond fascinating. But also not surprising, I guess? It just seems like the latest event in a causal chain so clear that it bears predictive power.

BioWare is committing themselves to "a longer-term redesign" of the Anthem experience, wherein they "reinvent the core gameplay loop with clear goals, motivating challenges and progression with meaningful rewards." To put it like that, to type it, to think and know it, means that it didn't have those things. Those are fundamental things. I wonder how long that sentence took to type.

The third panel originally had substantial percentage of Witcher references - nearly one hundred percent, by volume - but the final version of the strip leans more heavily into synthetic cathinones. But then the title stayed? I don't know. I'm leaving it. At some point in your "ouvre" you have to start studding your work with incongruities just to give historians something to do. Let the studious inheritors of this archive say that this is when Early Onset Coot Disease finally began its lethal arc.

I love the first part of a CCG.